Today, my maid did something which further stoked up my suspicion over her character. We were at the church in the morning. Before we went into the church, we brought Alycia and Sherilyn to the toilet. While I was still inside the toilet, my maid brought the gals out to have their hands washed. When I came out of the toilet, I saw my maid pinching Sherilyn’s face. I was shocked to see her do that. When I asked her why she did that, she told me that Sherilyn was being naughty as she has stepped her new shoes onto the mud. I was really pissed off with her and told her that even if she was being naughty, she should not have pinched her on the cheek. I further told her that she cannot hit my kids even if they were naughty.
No wonder this maid was kicked in her stomach by the previous employer. I just knew she must have done something very serious to infuriate her previous employer. But both the maid agent and my maid did not reveal the reason why she was being kicked. From today onwards, I should really be on my guard and never leave her alone with my kids. No wonder Sherilyn seems to dislike my maid. I just hope this is not the start of more problems to arise from this maid.
No. of times viewed = 310
ya…u better keep an eye on ur maid. teach ur girls to complaint to u if she hit them.
shireen, the main reason my maid n I can get along like “chi mui” is because i must be able to trust her and at times close one eye on minor things. But once we “tai em son ngarn” and starts to doubt the maid in many ways…in the long run it’s rather difficult to go on. For your case as a SAHM, u can watch her 24hours but for me once I can’t trust the maid or begin to find her ting sam ting fai..I would either send her back for counselling by the agent, have a heart to heart talk with her to study why she behaves that way or worse some to worse simply chnge another maid (which I’ve done before). I wouldnt want my kids to be victim due to the bad relationship between me and the maid. Usually I dont keep my maid more than 2-3 years once they start to show nonsense.
i wont allow maid to hit my kids and shd tell me if my kids were naughty. if i were, i would send her back to the agent.
got a treat for me b4 ur big day! http://kiddosrealm.com/?p=1146
After having 2 maids since my twins were born 4 years ago, I dare say i’ve had the good and bad experiences. I have learnt how to get maximum cooperation and help from my maid.
So I agree with renet that trust is very important. Once we let a stranger into our house, we must create condition whereby trust can grow. If not, how is it possible to look away for even one second or sleep in peace, let alone leave care of the kids and prep of our food to her? Since you’re paying for the maid’s service, consider that it is no different from an investment which you don’t want to go bad or sour.
Forget the master-slave mentality where only you can ‘melepas geram’ when you are not happy. It only means that since she cannot express her own unhappiness without fear of offending you, any dissatisfaction on her part will be ‘tahan-ed’ until… meletup on something, whether that’s your food or property or kids. oh, oh… Believe me, they too have their own version of what is not satisfactory. At least I think that’s what happened in those scary maid stories lah.
this is not to say she can melepas geram at me or my kids. I just encourage her to tell me if something is bothering her. If she looks pale or quiet I ask if she’s having period or headache or stomachache, apa apa lah . I will offer her panadol if she’s unwell. Main thing is, I give her the opportunity to communicate to say if she can’t perform because something is bothering her. IF nothing… ok buat kerja saja lah. Same like we want our boss to be with us at work, right?
I consider letting a stranger into my household is a risk. Since I’m taking that risk and pay much money for it too, I might as well make sure I do everything I can to make it worthwhile and beneficial for my family. As hubby and I work and have enough stress, we aim to limit domestic dramas that occur to those between me + hubby or our kids. Easy to forgive and forget within family, wut.
Maid drama is totally different matter altogether. Who knows their hearts or what other private stress/sorrow/fear/insecurities they have? Effect of drama with them is unknown, unpredictable. BIG RISK
So for me, from day one, I tell my maid what’s acceptable and what’s not. My principle is she eats what we eat. If we eat supper, she also eats. She gets her own portion, not leftovers – which she eats by herself. This is because I like us to have a family meal. Hubby and I deal with all the kids’ feeding dramas as part of parenting package since we spend much time at work. Also, my maid works form 6am till 8pm.. (10 hours) no fixed coffee-break or lunch break, like we do at work. So at the very least, she need to eat in peace. Any problems after 8pm, hubby and I deal with it ourselves, I don’t bother her. She needs her me-time too otherwise she might lose her sanity ler.. I want a sane, healthy and if possible, happy maid in our home so that its a safe place for our whole family.
As far as possible I want a congenial relationship with someone I have to live with, who cooks my food, feed my kids, and possibly rely on in any emergency. Eggs and barley she can have as many as she want. I don’t think its worth it to invite resentment (and possible retribution) over minor things.
She knows my expectations, and that I expect her to perform. The few times that she fell short I had a private, calm (no screaming) talk with her, away from the kids. If she is to be of any help with the kids, the kids must know that she does certain things with my consent. Same time, I tell my kids to respect her for she is older, its her job to care for them, keep them safe etc. I reckon if they give her some respect, she will, I believe, have affection for them too.
I think its time to change…You never know what she does behind your back…
oh no. that’s terrible. you really have to keep an eye on her. scary lah 🙁
oh dear, u shud tell your kids to report to you if she hits them again 🙁
Time to install CCTV in the hse? Yeah.. better ask the kids to let u know if she mistreated them. Altho u don’t hv evidence, at least u r aware of it and she knows u r aware of it.
Thanks peeps for all the comments and advise!