FollowChin Nee would like my views on whether I agree with sparing the rod and let the child rot or otherwise.
For me, I feel every child is different and should be handled differently. If my 2 rascals were obedient and do as I say, I would gladly spare the rod and never want to have anything to do with it. But unfortunately this is not the case and as with most toddlers, mine are willful, rebellious and seem to turn deaf to my instructions (selectively). I am really amazed with how some parents can spare the rod and raise very well behaved kids. I really need to learn from them. I know mine will stray without the rod. So far, they can be disciplined with the rod and I hope that as they outgrow their toddlerhood, I can gradually spare the rod too.
I’d love to hear how these parents discipline their kids and whether they spare or use the rod :
1. Jo-N
2. The New Parent
3. Scribbles For My Angels
4. ImMomsdaughter
5. Elaine
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1. Miche does not spare the rod.
2. Chinnee still spare the rod at this moment.
3. Healthfreakmommy does not spare the rod.
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hehe. i think i’m like u…spare when i don’t need them…use it when it’s needed
Hi HFM–thank you for thinking of me. But, as you read, I just did this tag.
What I’ve observed is that when children need to be hit to calm them or to get them to listen to a request, they actually don’t understand how to do those skills yet. They have learned to do them when they are either yelled at or scolded—that’s their training.
If we teach our children to answer our requests by repeatedly asking, they will answer on the third or fourth time. That is what they are being taught. Hitting them for that is kind of like teaching them how to do something and then when they do it, whacking them!
I find it’s best to go back to what they are missing or don’t know how to do so well and teaching them how to do it appropriately.
Defiance is mostly about a child doing the opposite of what is asked (they are actually trying to learn how to use opposites), they need to learn there is a time and place to use opposites and it’s not when given a request.
Great to read your thoughtful point of view HFM and thank you for sharing (smile)!
TNP…. thanks for your wonderful suggestions and advice 🙂
eh i opposite wor…hehehe still think my angels are “angels” leh!! in my eyes la…eh…am i spoiling them???
Mom of 2 angels… i gues that’s the difference between a full-time working mum and a SAHM. When you have too much of your kids, you tend to loose your patience easier!
Shireen, sorry I missed this post. I have done the tag and I am the culprit who tag TNP. Thanks for sharing your story Shireen. I spare the rod but I don’t think my kids are very well behaved. I do think that they will be one day cos love never fails. Your girls would not be as bad as Wayne, my second child.