I caught saw my maid walking out of the house to meet her friend boyfriend (she maintains he’s only her regular friend) for about 3 minutes yesterday afternoon. When I asked her, she admitted that her friend passed her a letter and asked her to go out in 2 weeks’ time as he has a day off. I advised my maid to be wary befriending men, especially a foreigner whom she barely knows. I told her that there is no ending in their relationship as he will not follow her to Indon when she returns and she can’t stay in Malaysia either. I also told her stories of young Indon maids who had been impregnated by men who later did not own up and washed their hands clean. It would be so embarrasing to be sent home in that manner. I told my maid that as long as she works for me, I will not allow her to go out, especially with men. This is also strictly against her contract with the agent.
Many of my readers had commented that I am being too liberal with my maid. From my experience with 4 previous maids, I find that being too strict with them and giving them no freedom at all only made matters worse. The result : my 1st maid charmed us tried to charm us with her urine (which I drank), my second and third maid stole our handphones and brought their boyfriends back to sleep and sneaked out at wee hours in the morning.
Like all human beings, the more we are prohibited from doing something, the more we would want to do it. So by giving them a LITTLE leeway, I find that the maid (as with all human) would be happier. I always put myself in their shoes. I would never be happy working for a boss who is always breathing down my neck, who does not give me any freedom and who does not allow me to talk to other people. It’s like being treated like a slave. I totally agree that these maids cannot be treated too nice or they will climb over our heads and even tell us off and try to be the boss of the family. But being too strict is not doing any good either and in my previous case, it back-fired.
I wonder how employers with maids who have worked for them faithfully for many years deal with their maids. I would love to hear from these employers. Do you allow your maids to go out and how do you handle them so that you, your family and your maid can live harmoniously together?
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wah better be careful lorr…well if she decides to runaway, the money with u rite, so not that bad she rugi oni
Since u’re quite close to her, jes advise her n tell her the consequences of her actions. Hope she listens to u. Coz seriously, if they really want to ‘kau kau charn’, there’s nothing much we can do. They’ll somehow find a way.
My friend said, she send back her Indo maid, and rather paid more money hiring cambodia maid. Which is less troublemaker and give her peace of mind till now….
Another tag for you! http://myecila.blogspot.com/2007/11/chain.html
i don’t allow the maids to even talk to the neighbours maid. the previous maid was so close to the neighbours maid that after we sent her home, i saw the neighbours maid wearin our tees, so many of them. i don’t know what else they trade.
so when the new maid came, no more talkin to neighbours maid, let alone go out.
my maid recently told me she wanted a sim card for the phone she brought from indon, so that she can keep in touch with her sis and sons back home in indon. i disagreed. phone charges are expensive, there’s no way she can afford callin back every other day. so no point in havin a phone.
you can try sendin her back to her agent, they will lecture and even smack them. let her learn her lesson the hard way if your advice doesn’t seems to work.
rachel has a very good maid. ask her!
http://rachellittleprinces.blogspot.com/
Leena… no point reprimanding my maid / sending her to the agent coz i need her more than she needs me and she’ll be going bk to Indon mid Jan08, so i’ll just close 2 eyes and ignore her wrong doings.
Sasha… thanks!
I hv 9 maids all together within the 5 years period. Hubby cheekily commented once that if I change maid again, he would change wife also. hahaha. Anyway, I hv an eye for this kind of things. Exactly around 3 – 6 months, the true colours of a bad maid will definitely flourish out. So if I cannot tahan, I just change rather than stress myself out.
So far, my existing indo maid has worked almost 2 years. She is planning to extend another year. Good la!!